The Thread for People who Just Want to Say Something Nice

[Low D]

Few things make me happier than ducklings getting a police escort.

VIDEO
Saskatoon police stop traffic to escort family of ducklings to the river
Police stopped traffic downtown, escorting a family of ducks to the river
CBC News Posted: May 12, 2016 2:34 PM CT Last Updated: May 13, 2016 8:49 AM CT
http://www.cbc.ca/news/canada/saskatoon/saskatoon-police-ducklings-escort-1.3579780

[Christine]

Hello firehazard! Hope you are well - and everyone else on the raft too.
Especially Kwak, as I just see: get better soon. And Low D, congrats to your daughter, that is amazing.

[firehazard]

Hello firehazard! Hope you are well - and everyone else on the raft too.
Especially Kwak, as I just see: get better soon. And Low D, congrats to your daughter, that is amazing.

Hi Christine. Yep, all goodish here. Latest news from the hazard household is that eldest hazardette just had an encounter with a bear. This is, I believe, unusual for a resident of Manchester, though soulfinger may know differently. When we asked her what kind of bear it was, she said, "A fucking big one."

Hope things are fine with you.

[Christine]

A bear??? Unless she is a zoologist... As she was describing the creature so succinctly I am assuming she came out the better, and it is the bear we have to worry about.

It reminded me of a very silly mistranslation of Pogues lyrics:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BYaxIhojY_E

All surviving, thanks, but very short of Pogues-related shows, I had to miss two in a row.

[firehazard]

A bear??? Unless she is a zoologist... As she was describing the creature so succinctly I am assuming she came out the better, and it is the bear we have to worry about...

Not a zoologist but a biochemist. She was attending a conference somewhere up in the mountains in Colorado. They'd been warned that bears sometimes came into the town, and told what to do if they encountered one. So one evening a few of the delegates from this oncology conference went into town for a few drinks, and on the way back they came face to face with this bear. Apparently it was the same height as eldest daughter, on all fours. I mean the bear was on all fours, not the daughter - they hadn't had that much to drink, and that would've been a pretty small bear. But I think "fucking big" would obviously be the scientific term for it.

So having been warned that the correct way to behave in the presence of a bear is to stay calm and still, this group of scientists all screamed and ran. Fortunately the bear ran in a different direction.

Glad to hear things are well with you, Christine. I too have been somewhat starved of gigs recently (apart from Bruce at Wembley). And nothing Pogues-related at all is in prospect. Although Mr Ranken's band is apparently playing at some event in Saffron Walden next Saturday, but I haven't managed to persuade anyone that they want to drive me to Saffron Walden on a Saturday night.

[Christine]

If it's black, attack; if it's brown, lie down; if it's white, say goodnight. In any colour, best stay away. Very glad to hear that a bunch of oncologists are behaving entirely rationally and scientifically. But even glader that she is ok, it must have been a massive shock.

Try talking someone into seeing lovely Audley End for the day, and afterwards casually suggest that this might be a nice way to wind up the excursion? I see that The Mysterious Wheels are also doing a Convoy to Calais benefit in London next Thursday. Carefully planned to coincide with my work I do hope you get to go see them - have fun.

[firehazard]

If it's black, attack; if it's brown, lie down; if it's white, say goodnight. In any colour, best stay away. Very glad to hear that a bunch of oncologists are behaving entirely rationally and scientifically. But even glader that she is ok, it must have been a massive shock.

Try talking someone into seeing lovely Audley End for the day, and afterwards casually suggest that this might be a nice way to wind up the excursion? I see that The Mysterious Wheels are also doing a Convoy to Calais benefit in London next Thursday. Carefully planned to coincide with my work I do hope you get to go see them - have fun.

It was reputedly a black bear. I'm sure there's a potential movie plot in there somewhere.

Audley End isn't a bad idea, but I'm already committed elsewhere during the day. Partly given the weather for this coming week, an open-air gig in Saffron Walden marketplace on Saturday night hasn't yet appealed to any prospective drivers.

[DzM]

If it's black, attack; if it's brown, lie down; if it's white, say goodnight. In any colour, best stay away.

Where the hell do you live that you had to come up with a mnemonic about how to behave around bears? And where are the missing ones? Grizzly? Panda?

[Low D]

If it's black, attack; if it's brown, lie down; if it's white, say goodnight. In any colour, best stay away.

Where the hell do you live that you had to come up with a mnemonic about how to behave around bears? And where are the missing ones? Grizzly? Panda?

"Brown" is Grizzly, aka Brown Bear aka Kodiak. As for Pandas, in Canada at least, you are warned of them by the presence of large numbers of media and our Prime minister.


Also of note (although i realize this attack happened "in town"), out here in the mountains it's generally advised to wear/carry a bell if you're walking in the woods, the idea being to warn the bear of your approach. I've been told the bears call these "dinner bells".*

*Also, incidentally, what the increasing number of coyotes (220 in Vancouver at last count) apparently call those little bells on cats' collars

[DzM]

Also of note (although i realize this attack happened "in town"), out here in the mountains it's generally advised to wear/carry a bell if you're walking in the woods, the idea being to warn the bear of your approach. I've been told the bears call these "dinner bells".*

I understand that the pepper spray is also considered to be some form of meal spice to bears. Kinda like Sriracha sauce.

[firehazard]

If it's black, attack; if it's brown, lie down; if it's white, say goodnight. In any colour, best stay away.

Where the hell do you live that you had to come up with a mnemonic about how to behave around bears? And where are the missing ones? Grizzly? Panda?

I think the mnemonic that eldest daughter followed went something like: "if it's a big 'un, scream and run".

[Heather]

If it's black, attack; if it's brown, lie down; if it's white, say goodnight. In any colour, best stay away. Very glad to hear that a bunch of oncologists are behaving entirely rationally and scientifically. But even glader that she is ok, it must have been a massive shock.

Try talking someone into seeing lovely Audley End for the day, and afterwards casually suggest that this might be a nice way to wind up the excursion? I see that The Mysterious Wheels are also doing a Convoy to Calais benefit in London next Thursday. Carefully planned to coincide with my work I do hope you get to go see them - have fun.

It was reputedly a black bear. I'm sure there's a potential movie plot in there somewhere.

Audley End isn't a bad idea, but I'm already committed elsewhere during the day. Partly given the weather for this coming week, an open-air gig in Saffron Walden marketplace on Saturday night hasn't yet appealed to any prospective drivers.

Audley End and Saffron Walden are near my sister's, she lives in Langley, I was there last week.

The sister isn't in my good books (or my parents) at the moment (won't go into that, it's complicated) and I didn't see her anyway, but mentioned the gig to my mum, shouldn't think she'll be going though as transport down there is rubbish and she is rather old.

[Christine]

If it's black, attack; if it's brown, lie down; if it's white, say goodnight. In any colour, best stay away.

Where the hell do you live that you had to come up with a mnemonic about how to behave around bears? And where are the missing ones? Grizzly? Panda?

Good lord, no, Paddington Bear is more likely to show up around here. At a push, urban foxes.

[DzM]

If it's black, attack; if it's brown, lie down; if it's white, say goodnight. In any colour, best stay away.

Where the hell do you live that you had to come up with a mnemonic about how to behave around bears? And where are the missing ones? Grizzly? Panda?

Good lord, no, Paddington Bear is more likely to show up around here. At a push, urban foxes.

Teddy? Plush?

[Frances]

Happy PRIDE Dublin, London, NYC and San Francisco!