Crap Jokes
Re: Crap Jokes
Thu Mar 05, 2015 5:03 pm
< In my best Rik Mayall voice> Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead!
I wasn't born to be somebody's kicking post, I wasn't born to be...
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old barney greyheron - Innamorato
- Posts: 1655
- Joined: Tue Feb 03, 2009 8:19 pm
- Location: Boston UK
- Iggy Lady
- Pedrolino
- Posts: 52
- Joined: Fri Aug 03, 2012 9:25 pm
- Location: Just North of the end of the Leeds to Selby Railway - where Paddy worked in 1843!!
Re: Crap Jokes
Thu Apr 02, 2015 8:59 am
I stayed up all night to see where the sun went.
Then it dawned on me.
The past, the present and the future walked into a bar.
It was tense.
Then it dawned on me.
The past, the present and the future walked into a bar.
It was tense.
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Heather - Mr. Chekov
- Posts: 5072
- Joined: Wed Sep 07, 2005 3:09 pm
- Location: Liverpool.
Re: Crap Jokes
Fri Apr 03, 2015 8:49 am
I did a theatrical performance about puns.
Really it was a play on words.
Really it was a play on words.
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Heather - Mr. Chekov
- Posts: 5072
- Joined: Wed Sep 07, 2005 3:09 pm
- Location: Liverpool.
Re: Crap Jokes
Wed Apr 08, 2015 10:42 pm
Heather wrote:What do you call an Israeli with amnesia?
The Foggy Jew.
Courtesy of Ambrose Bierce, American journalist who died over 100 years ago..
'War is God's way of teaching Americans geography.'
And it's still true over 100 years later..............sorry you guys over there
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Fr. McGreer - Innamorato
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- Location: Co. Tipperary, Ireland.
Re: Crap Jokes
Fri Apr 17, 2015 8:09 pm
I'm writing a play about the invention of the tampon in the 1930's.
It's a period piece.
It's a period piece.
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Heather - Mr. Chekov
- Posts: 5072
- Joined: Wed Sep 07, 2005 3:09 pm
- Location: Liverpool.
Re: Crap Jokes
Sun Apr 19, 2015 3:24 am
My girls came home from kindergarten the other day with a good crap knock knock joke ....
Knock knock
Who's there?
Interrupting chicken.
Interrupting chi ---
BRAWK!!!
Knock knock
Who's there?
Interrupting chicken.
Interrupting chi ---
BRAWK!!!
More whiskey
And fresh horses for the men!
And fresh horses for the men!
- Sportin' Life
- Brighella
- Posts: 964
- Joined: Wed Jun 06, 2007 11:16 pm
- Location: Seattle, America
Re: Crap Jokes
Thu May 21, 2015 8:52 am
Knock Knock
Who's there?
Cash.
Cash who?
No thanks, I just had some pistachios.
Who's there?
Cash.
Cash who?
No thanks, I just had some pistachios.
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Heather - Mr. Chekov
- Posts: 5072
- Joined: Wed Sep 07, 2005 3:09 pm
- Location: Liverpool.
Re: Crap Jokes
Fri Jul 03, 2015 8:18 pm
Heather wrote:Knock Knock
Who's there?
Cash.
Cash who?
No thanks, I just had some pistachios.
bless you
KMRIA
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Tal - Arlecchino
- Posts: 742
- Joined: Tue Feb 14, 2012 3:38 pm
Re: Crap Jokes
Sat Jul 11, 2015 8:56 am
"Please take out your Derry Journals and turn to page......"
Heard as an intro to an Undertones track a last night's gig in Wakefield.
Heard as an intro to an Undertones track a last night's gig in Wakefield.
KMRIA
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Tal - Arlecchino
- Posts: 742
- Joined: Tue Feb 14, 2012 3:38 pm
Re: Crap Jokes
Tue Jul 28, 2015 8:46 am
In a cemetery I saw 4 men carrying a coffin round and round.
Three hours later I saw the same men carrying the same coffin and I thought, 'they've lost the plot'.
Three hours later I saw the same men carrying the same coffin and I thought, 'they've lost the plot'.
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Heather - Mr. Chekov
- Posts: 5072
- Joined: Wed Sep 07, 2005 3:09 pm
- Location: Liverpool.
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