The Medusa Fora

chinaski wrote:

old barney greyheron wrote:mek me.

*twists arm painfully behind old man's back*

out with it!

ahem.

Ahem back...and a little bit of spit flew out...
CURTAINS.
Behind net curtains, phone in hand
in towns and cities throughout the land
shrivelled souls and dirty minds
twitchy curtains, dusty blinds
them at number seventeen
they've got sky sports and a plasma screen
neither of 'em have got a job
they're on the fiddle they're on the rob
make a phone call, tell a tale
write a letter to the daily mail
grass a neighbour be a spy
gippos and pakis and chavs, oh my
call 'em names behind their backs
you're a model citizen, you pay your tax
behind net curtains with a secret smile
spineless, friendless, loathsome, vile.
barney.

old barney greyheron wrote:Ahem back...and a little bit of spit flew out...
CURTAINS.
Behind net curtains, phone in hand
in towns and cities throughout the land
shrivelled souls and dirty minds
twitchy curtains, dusty blinds
them at number seventeen
they've got sky sports and a plasma screen
neither of 'em have got a job
they're on the fiddle they're on the rob
make a phone call, tell a tale
write a letter to the daily mail
grass a neighbour be a spy
gippos and pakis and chavs, oh my
call 'em names behind their backs
you're a model citizen, you pay your tax
behind net curtains with a secret smile
spineless, friendless, loathsome, vile.
barney.

nice. but I don't think you answered the question. that's ok. I'm over it. you're funny. I think maybe you (if you stay) are going to have to be The Raft's Jester. I mean that with all due compliment.

Actually, now that I think about it, that would make a good nickname. old barney greyheron is just so damn LONG.

some more curtains.

what's behind the curtain mister, what's behind the screen?
a barren godforsaken place that no one's seen
what's behind the curtain daddy, what's behind the mask?
the answer to a question you have no right to ask
what's behind the curtain mummy, what's behind the smile?
a shameful family secret if you knew you'd run a mile
what's behind the curtain boss-man, what's behind the veil?
the dregs of your ambition in a stinking rusty pail
what's behind the curtain preacher, what's behind the blind?
a piss-stained cardboard box, it's where god keeps his poor lost mind

barney.

old barney greyheron wrote:some more curtains.

what's behind the curtain mister, what's behind the screen?
a barren godforsaken place that no one's seen
what's behind the curtain daddy, what's behind the mask?
the answer to a question you have no right to ask
what's behind the curtain mummy, what's behind the smile?
a shameful family secret if you knew you'd run a mile
what's behind the curtain boss-man, what's behind the veil?
the dregs of your ambition in a stinking rusty pail
what's behind the curtain preacher, what's behind the blind?
a piss-stained cardboard box, it's where god keeps his poor lost mind

barney.

this is great!

Aw shucks, now you made ME blush.
<hides head inside dressing-gown>

Get a room.

Get a toothbrush.

old barney greyheron wrote:some more curtains.

what's behind the curtain mister, what's behind the screen?
a barren godforsaken place that no one's seen
what's behind the curtain daddy, what's behind the mask?
the answer to a question you have no right to ask
what's behind the curtain mummy, what's behind the smile?
a shameful family secret if you knew you'd run a mile
what's behind the curtain boss-man, what's behind the veil?
the dregs of your ambition in a stinking rusty pail
what's behind the curtain preacher, what's behind the blind?
a piss-stained cardboard box, it's where god keeps his poor lost mind

barney.

Made me wish my old pal Agnes Bernelle was still around. She'd have had to be dug out of it once it was set to music and in her repertoire. Maybe Camille O'Sullivan could do it justice?

I will be 'googling' those two later..bit busy spring-cleaning under the beds..UGH!...having a well-earned tea break.
I have three things to send me to my grave a happy man...

1...a compliment from phil chevron <swoons>
2...onstage with mclelland, singing 'the rising of the moon' at the Axe <screams>
3...peeping up chinaski's shorts <has heart attack>

someone on another thread...i can't remember which one..nor who it was..called my pomes beautiful...
i have to say, i'm gobsmacked..that's speechless to you yankees...really, it's just something i've done the last couple of years...
thank you so much...i don't see them that way cos if i say 'em out loud, they mostly get spat out full of bile, rather than recited...or they're just an observation of everyday shit..is 'shopping' on here? i dunno..if it ain't i'll put it on..just me watching a woman in a supermarket and writing some stuff about it...humdrum life..
anyway thanks, whoever you were..you made an old greyheron very happy..

SHOPPING.
In and out the supermarkets, up and down the aisles
with trolley, kids and pushchair she'll walk for miles and miles
with one eye on the prices and one eye on the weans
bargain basement burgers and tesco value beans
half-price bread that's not quite fresh, she can't afford too much
the phone bill's due, the mortgage too, the car needs a new clutch
the kids are wanting this and that, they drive her off her nut
she'll buy 'em sweets and comics just to shut the buggers up
searching through the wine display her eyes light up with glee
they've made her an offer she can't refuse... buy one, get one free.

barney.

old barney greyheron wrote:SHOPPING.
In and out the supermarkets, up and down the aisles
with trolley, kids and pushchair she'll walk for miles and miles
with one eye on the prices and one eye on the weans
bargain basement burgers and tesco value beans
half-price bread that's not quite fresh, she can't afford too much
the phone bill's due, the mortgage too, the car needs a new clutch
the kids are wanting this and that, they drive her off her nut
she'll buy 'em sweets and comics just to shut the buggers up
searching through the wine display her eyes light up with glee
they've made her an offer she can't refuse... buy one, get one free.

barney.

well Hot Damn Barney! That was worth waitin' for! It's yours, yes? Don't remember if you have ever mentioned....have you made any attempts to publish? You are really good......as many have pointed out.... Better than most. For sure worthy of putting to print.

so? have you?

if not...please consider.

Mr. C? You know anyone?

Is it mine? I could've taken offence at that, but I won't...cheeky chinaski...wanna fight?

NO FIXED ABODE.
could say he's down on his luck, each night he's out in the cold
sheltering in doorways, he's of no fixed abode

he's a tramp he's a beggar, always on the road
with no place to call home, he's of no fixed abode

he's been disenfranchised, he's officially disowned
an invisible man now, mister no fixed abode

they found him dead one cold morning, I prayed for his soul
it said in the paper he was of no fixed abode.