A thing I learned today

[Mike from Boston]

Today, i learned that Mick Jagger's29 year old ballerina girlfriend is pregnant. This will be child number 8 for Mick, who turns 73 later this month.

Congratulations to the happy couple.

We were talking about this at work. He already is a great-grandfather, so his great-grandchild will be older than his newest child!! ( BIANCA-Jade-Assisi-Ezra)

[Heather]

It's really hard to write about something you know very little about, however I'm getting there, slowly.

[Low D]

Went to a gun range with the whole family for Mrs. Me's 40th bday. I learned handguns are easy to shoot, and while i enjoyed it i very much I also learned that I never want to live in a country where everybody is carrying them around. That is a ridiculous idea.

[DzM]

I [...] learned that I never want to live in a country where everybody is carrying them around.

"IS" or "CAN/MAY"?

I know a lot of people 'round these parts certainly enjoy their strapped on lumps o' metal, but they are very much in the minority. Most people in 'Murica don't carry a firearm, don't own a firearm, and have never fired a firearm.

Just pointing out the obvious. It's what I do.

[Low D]

I [...] learned that I never want to live in a country where everybody is carrying them around.

"IS" or "CAN/MAY"?

I know a lot of people 'round these parts certainly enjoy their strapped on lumps o' metal, but they are very much in the minority. Most people in 'Murica don't carry a firearm, don't own a firearm, and have never fired a firearm.

Just pointing out the obvious. It's what I do.

Sorry, yes, "everybody" was clearly unfair. But the thought that i might be on, say, a bus, and even one random person might have one is just crazy.

Handguns are legal to own here in Canada (although you need a permit), but the ONLY place you are allowed to shoot 'em is at a licensed gun range.

[Low D]

I [...] learned that I never want to live in a country where everybody is carrying them around.

"IS" or "CAN/MAY"?

I know a lot of people 'round these parts certainly enjoy their strapped on lumps o' metal, but they are very much in the minority. Most people in 'Murica don't carry a firearm.

Just pointing out the obvious. It's what I do.

Although I might mention I don't actually NAME any particular country there, but you read "a county where everybody is carrying them around" as "USA", so maybe you've stereo typed type own country!

Haha, just kidding don't shoot

[DzM]

Fair point.

[Low D]

Fair point.

Naw, it's fine, 'cause really i WAS in fact thinking of the US. That said, it's also made me think about an old friend of mine and his return to Somalia, and how disturbingly easy it was to get a gun (which he bought because guns were everywhere.) (Sound familiar?)

http://www.straight.com/news/vancouverite-aweis-issa-appalled-and-disturbed-impact-islamic-fundamentalists-somalia

Is it bad that i think of Somalia in the same breath as the US? I love you my southern neighbours, I do, and that's why i worry about you.

[old barney greyheron]

Can't sleep tonight, not unusual but tonight i'm in a state of shock, I think. For over three years, my son and I were totally estranged. He lives about 70 miles away from me and that was just fine. Last year he served his 2nd prison term, for robbing houses to get money for drugs. I should mention he's 37 years old with children..he's not some wayward youth. Anyway, earlier this year I tentatively put out 'feelers'..to cut a long story short, we became quite close, I said let's forget the past (he'd been a petty criminal for two decades) and work together to keep you on track and out of trouble. He got a full-time job, a flat, gym membership, he was healthy and fit and working..planning to come and stay with me when he had some paid holiday..it was all going really well..then one day I tried to text him and got the reply 'who are you'...he'd sold his phone..since then he avoided any efforts to contact him..cos he was using drugs again and I found out he had lost his job some weeks before..that's another thing, he lies all the time...his ex-wife told me he keeps going to her house drugged up and shouting abuse from the street..his 16 year-old daughter tried to make him go away and he scared her so badly she won't go near him now. I'd heard nothing for weeks until tonight I had a facebook message from one of his daughters..my grand-daughters..she said she was sorry for having to be the one to tell me, but Brendan (my son's name) has been telling people that i'm dead...I cannot get my head round this information..there seems no logical reason for him to say something like that, that's so easily disproved..it appears to be pure malice. I just can't fathom his mind at all anymore.

[Christine]

Very sorry to hear, obg, sounds absolutely awful. Clearly it would be desirable to keep yourself (and granddaughters) as far away as possible but also clearly impossible to stay emotionally uninvolved. All the best to you.

[Mike from Boston]

Can't sleep tonight, not unusual but tonight i'm in a state of shock, I think. For over three years, my son and I were totally estranged. He lives about 70 miles away from me and that was just fine. Last year he served his 2nd prison term, for robbing houses to get money for drugs. I should mention he's 37 years old with children..he's not some wayward youth. Anyway, earlier this year I tentatively put out 'feelers'..to cut a long story short, we became quite close, I said let's forget the past (he'd been a petty criminal for two decades) and work together to keep you on track and out of trouble. He got a full-time job, a flat, gym membership, he was healthy and fit and working..planning to come and stay with me when he had some paid holiday..it was all going really well..then one day I tried to text him and got the reply 'who are you'...he'd sold his phone..since then he avoided any efforts to contact him..cos he was using drugs again and I found out he had lost his job some weeks before..that's another thing, he lies all the time...his ex-wife told me he keeps going to her house drugged up and shouting abuse from the street..his 16 year-old daughter tried to make him go away and he scared her so badly she won't go near him now. I'd heard nothing for weeks until tonight I had a facebook message from one of his daughters..my grand-daughters..she said she was sorry for having to be the one to tell me, but Brendan (my son's name) has been telling people that i'm dead...I cannot get my head round this information..there seems no logical reason for him to say something like that, that's so easily disproved..it appears to be pure malice. I just can't fathom his mind at all anymore.

Sorry to hear this barney. So sad to hear he cleaned up and fell off the wagon, especially if there are kids. I had a relative who went through this-robbing for a drug habit. Cleaned up now, but you always have your radar up hoping that don't succumb to the drugs again.

[Low D]

Barney this is terrible. Having kids myself, i know you might blame yourself for all his problems and feel the all guilt... but the reality of that is neither here or there. It sounds like you tried your best to support him, and hopefully you will have another opportunity in the future to give him that support again, when he's ready for it.

The important thing right now is you support his ex-wife and your grandkids any way you can, and build the best relationship with them that you can. Which i'm sure is awkward at best, but you all need each other. And at 1000 days sober (goodonya, by the way!!!) you will certainly provide a better role model. This may mean you helping protect them, emotionally at least, from him. Hopefully some day he'll come around, but you need to be there for the ones who need you now (and no doubt you could use a bit of family love yourself). Best of luck through all this.

[firehazard]

Blimey, barney, that's hard. Sorry to hear of your family's troubles, thoughts are being sent in your direction.

[soulfinger]

Sorry to hear that Barney. I hope things take a turn for the better very soon.

[old barney greyheron]

Thanks guys..I felt better just getting it off my chest..