Thread for things that dont deserve threads

[Low D]

To be honest, currently all elections seem to be basically a waste of time. Basically the same baxtards always get in. Or sometimes a slightly different set of baxtards who mostly do the same carp anyway. Or is that just over here?

I've sort of always felt this way, but much more so now. However i have been heartened to see the Federal NDP (New Democratic Party) here in Canada start acting like social democrats, which is how they were founded. But it's depressing to see the polls basically say "well, we really like NDP but we're going to vote Liberal".

Amazonian Looniebucks remain un-earned.

OK, let's change this. I have $13.73 Amazonian Looniebucks to be awarded to the most entertaining description of the Snap Election. Ref: "This election could have been an email." Polls close Friday night.

https://www.cbc.ca/news/canada/kitchene ... -1.6185978

Ok, how about this? Some background, we have a new party here, the PPC - People's Party Of Canada. As the name basically screams, they are a populist right-wing break-off from the Conservative party, very Trump-ian. This was their first election. They didn't win a single riding (although about 1500 assholes in every riding voted for 'em).

Q: What's the difference between the PPC and a Toilet?

A: A toilet has a seat.

[DzM]

Ok, how about this? Some background, we have a new party here, the PPC - People's Party Of Canada. As the name basically screams, they are a populist right-wing break-off from the Conservative party, very Trump-ian. This was their first election. They didn't win a single riding (although about 1500 assholes in every riding voted for 'em).

Q: What's the difference between the PPC and a Toilet?

A: A toilet has a seat.

Emergency backup punchlines:

A: You can flush a toilet to make the shit go away.

A: One of them is cold, and hard, and full of shit and piss. The other one is a toilet.

I'm positive there's one to be had about "crapping away the future" but I can't make it work right now.

[Frances]

Nicholas Cage was drunk in Vegas. Very drunk as opposed to very sober like all the teetotalers around.

So fucking what.

It's Vegas for Christ's sake.

https://www.thethings.com/nicolas-cage- ... too-drunk/

[DzM]

Amazonian Looniebucks remain un-earned.

OK, let's change this. I have $13.73 Amazonian Looniebucks to be awarded to the most entertaining description of the Snap Election. Ref: "This election could have been an email." Polls close Friday night.

Dammit people, you're making it really hard to give away $13.71 Amazonian Looniebucks.

[firehazard]

I have $13.73 Amazonian Looniebucks for the first person to create for me a plausible reason for why the Canadian Snap Election wasn't a stupid, expensive waste of time. Clock starts ... Now!

I guess it gave employment to a bunch of election officials?

[DzM]

I have $13.73 Amazonian Looniebucks for the first person to create for me a plausible reason for why the Canadian Snap Election wasn't a stupid, expensive waste of time. Clock starts ... Now!

I guess it gave employment to a bunch of election officials?

Sooo ... Some civil service employees got an unexpected bonus? A version of the Keynesian idea that when there is mass unemployment and the economy is struggling, that a responsible government would pay one person to dig holes and a second person to fill them back in? That's not a terrible spin on this.

[Frances]

Just went to my appt to get the Pfizer booster and my dude said you don't go until 6 months after last vax. That wasn't clear on the appt website (or I missed it?)

Just putting it out there in case anyone else is near their 6 months mark and looking to score.

[firehazard]

Just went to my appt to get the Pfizer booster and my dude said you don't go until 6 months after last vax. That wasn't clear on the appt website (or I missed it?)

Just putting it out there in case anyone else is near their 6 months mark and looking to score.

Same policy over here. So in theory I'd be due my booster in about 2 weeks' time, I think. But there ain't no boosters in this town.

[soulfinger]

Just went to my appt to get the Pfizer booster and my dude said you don't go until 6 months after last vax. That wasn't clear on the appt website (or I missed it?)

Just putting it out there in case anyone else is near their 6 months mark and looking to score.

Same policy over here. So in theory I'd be due my booster in about 2 weeks' time, I think. But there ain't no boosters in this town.

My old fellah received a letter inviting him for a booster on Friday, rang to book an appointment on Saturday and had his booster jab on Sunday at a local pharmacy. NHS Manchester!

He'd celebrated his 90th Birthday with three pints of Guinness and several large Jamesons on Saturday. Not sure if that'll have any impact on the efficacy of the vaccine!

[Frances]

Just went to my appt to get the Pfizer booster and my dude said you don't go until 6 months after last vax. That wasn't clear on the appt website (or I missed it?)

Just putting it out there in case anyone else is near their 6 months mark and looking to score.

Same policy over here. So in theory I'd be due my booster in about 2 weeks' time, I think. But there ain't no boosters in this town.

I looked at the website, there was a bright red banner across telling you it had to be 6 months after.
I am getting dumber by the day and could care less.

As are we all.

Anybody who says different is fucking delusional.
Or fucking Bono-Vox.

Fuck that guy.

[firehazard]

Just went to my appt to get the Pfizer booster and my dude said you don't go until 6 months after last vax. That wasn't clear on the appt website (or I missed it?)

Just putting it out there in case anyone else is near their 6 months mark and looking to score.

Same policy over here. So in theory I'd be due my booster in about 2 weeks' time, I think. But there ain't no boosters in this town.

My old fellah received a letter inviting him for a booster on Friday, rang to book an appointment on Saturday and had his booster jab on Sunday at a local pharmacy. NHS Manchester!

He'd celebrated his 90th Birthday with three pints of Guinness and several large Jamesons on Saturday. Not sure if that'll have any impact on the efficacy of the vaccine!

Birthday wishes to your old man. And I'm sure the drink must help.

And well done NHS Manchester, good to hear. Down here the vaccination rates have been slow right from the beginning. The percentages in Cambridge are still about 20% behind the national rate. Which is bizarre. So I guess I'll have to rely on the Guinness and whiskey for a while yet...

[Frances]

Bono-Vox referring to Tall Poppy Syndrome while not allowing other members who have been singled out to speak to finish their sentences is quite something.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lSHzbqyk9_A

Being full of yourself and feeling victim to said syndrome is not the point.

Does the one on the end never speak?

It’s like when Maroon Five said they expected haters when they did the Super Bowl halftime show.
Nobody hated on Prince you mooks.

[Frances]

De Niro will sign your boxing gloves for $949 n’ stuff.
Or.. you could just ask his office for a Heat headshot for FREE.
LMFAO.

https://celebritysendins.com/product-ca ... t-de-niro/

A kid in the family has one which I figured would come in handy if anyone ever opened a pizza parlor.

This one looks like an incredibly bad signature copy attempt, but what the hell do I know?

[Frances]

Nobody should’ve allowed William Shatner to fly anywhere.
He looks unhealthy AF.

Who paid for him to go?

He seems crafty enough to not pay.
Who would pay to stroke out in space?

[left]

51 years ago, in Oregon…:


On November 9, 1970,[1] a 45-foot-long (14 m) sperm whale washed ashore at Florence on the central Oregon Coast.[2][3] The weight of the carcass was estimated at 8 short tons (16,000 lb; 7,300 kg).[4] At the time, Oregon beaches were under the jurisdiction of the state's Highway Division, which, after consulting with the United States Navy, decided to remove the whale using dynamite – assuming that the resulting pieces would be small enough for scavenger animals to consume.

George Thornton, the engineer in charge of the operation, told an interviewer that he was not sure how much dynamite would be needed, saying that he had been chosen to remove the whale because his supervisor had gone hunting. A charge of one-half short ton (450 kg) of dynamite was selected.[5][6] A military veteran with explosives training who happened to be in the area warned that the planned twenty cases of dynamite was far too much, and that 20 sticks (8.4 lb or 3.8 kg[7]) would have sufficed, but his advice went unheeded.[2]

The dynamite was detonated on November 12 at 3:45 pm.[1] The resulting explosion was caught on film by cameraman Doug Brazil for a story reported by news reporter Paul Linnman of KATU-TV in Portland, Oregon. In his voice-over, Linnman joked that "land-lubber newsmen" became "land-blubber newsmen ... for the blast blasted blubber beyond all believable bounds."[5] The explosion caused large pieces of blubber to land near buildings and in parking lots some distance away from the beach. Only some of the whale was disintegrated; most of it remained on the beach for the Oregon Highway Division workers to clear away. In his report, Linnman also noted that scavenger birds, who it had been hoped would eat the remains of the carcass after the explosion, did not appear as they were possibly scared away by the noise. The explosives-expert veteran's brand-new automobile, purchased during a "Get a Whale of a Deal" promotion in a nearby city, was flattened by a chunk of falling blubber.


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uD5sPgV61bw