The Shrink

Publication: Melody Maker Date Printed: January 19, 1985 By: Barry McIlheney

THE COLUMN THAT STRAPS TODAY'S POP WALLAHS TO A COUCH AND PUTS THEM UNDER SCRUTINY BY THE MM QUACK.

BAND AID
A lot of ugly faces on one video. If the money goes to the people in Africa at least they're doing something for somebody, I suppose. If they gave 10 percent of their earnings out of their pockets then it would probably be a lot more use.

JOHN F. KENNEDY
A great man. A symbol of how I want to end up - being shot in the back of a car in Dallas but rich.

BAD REPUTATIONS
I've got one but it's all lies. I don't agree with reputations anyway.

SYNTHESISERS
Don't understand them. I prefer fresh cream.

THE NIPS
Yawn

THE GREATEST MAN I EVER MET
Spider Stacy

REPUBLICANISM
I'm one. It's up to the person, and personally yeah - but it depends. It's something we could talk about all night. It's not a black and white thing, but basically all people have the right to govern themselves.

THE DUBLINERS
Well, they're the ultimate aren't they? Great beards, great beards. Great band. A big influence on us. Them and the Clancy Brothers. And Christy Moore.

FASHION
If you want to know anything about fashion, look at me. Fashion is what I'm wearing at the time.

TELEVISION
I quite like watching television when there's nothing else to do. At the moment "Dallas" is my favorite programme, but "Minder" and "Brass" and things like that were the best when they were on.

POP STARS
Don't like 'em. It'll be different when I'm one. But when I'm one I'm not going to hang around with the rest of 'em anyway.

PUBS
Handy places to get a drink when they're open. They're alright as long as they haven't got video games. Juke boxes and pool tables are okay. I like 'em when they don't chuck you out too quick.

1985
Probably won't be much different to 1984. I just hope I'll have more money at the end of it.

RICH PEOPLE
Oh I want to be one of 'em. But I don't like 'em.

MRS. THATCHER
Old bag. Let's put it this way - I wish she'd been in a different room at Brighton.

THE MEN THEY COULDN'T HANG
Ha! I wish they would.

LEND ME £10 AND I'LL BUY YOU A DRINK
A line from "Boys From The County Hell" It says what it means. It's something I happen to say quite a lot.

ELVIS COSTELLO
A great bloke. No honestly, I like him. He's one pop star I don't mind.

THE MINERS
Up the miners. I hope they win.

IRELAND
Great place, great country, great people, great pubs.

ROLLING STONES
A bunch of old faggots.

VIDEOS
I like good videos but there aren't very many. "In The Neighborhood" by Tom Waits - that was a good one. I like videos with a bit of imagination but few of them are. Our videos will be brilliant though if we ever make any.

THE TUBE
Oh I don't watch it very much. Don't watch any pop programmes much.

SICK JOKES
I've got nothing against them. In fact, the sicker the better.

PAUL WELLER
He's another good bloke. I hate pop stars basically unless they're personal friends of mine. Weller's alright.

TRADITIONAL MUSIC
All music is traditional , it just depends which tradition it is. Personally I don't really care wheter it's traditional or not. I like a lot of Irish traditional music, and Scottish traditional and some English and American traditional music. Generally speaking, I prefer traditional music to pop music.

---

---

Your intrepid maintainer is DzM.